Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Methinks I See a Trend

On my mind this past few weeks?  Life and the future.  The intricacies and amazing complexities of growing up, growing older, growing, period.  The worries, questions, promises, chances, paths, choices, dangers, surprises of moving forward.  I'm not a forward-moving person naturally, and generally the Future has to come in and drag me out by my hair rather than the other way round....

But the way everything approaches and then blossoms and then moves on by....  First you meet one concept, one new situation, and it hits you in the face.  The moment you pull through it, thinking "Okay, I can do this," suddenly it is so much bigger and harder than you thought.  Sometimes I know, I can take this.  One step at a time.  Keep going. Other times, I find myself saying, "It's not FAIR...it's too HARD, what's the POINT?"

Keep your eyes open.  Look around you and realize everything you're living for.  What are you looking forward?  You're not alone, and obviously many people before you survived this point, and many people will go after you.  Leave them a legacy, try to help them through it.  Why else do we experience trials or processes?  Why else do we experience at all??  To grow, yes, to mature, to achieve great things, and so that we can relate to those who come behind and try to help them.  I will always be grateful to and for my older friends who look out for me, who teach me to learn from their mistakes, who encourage me.  Sometimes it's so comforting just to know someone else understands, yes?

Oh, how do you write this down?  I tell you, every day, every minute, my heart is singing.  I'm ready to take it all on.  I don't know the gameplan :: I don't know what's coming :: I don't know how I'll feel when I get there :: the Point Is To Go.  I'm ready to Believe.

And in the middle of all of these Grown-Up thoughts, let's take a moment to notice the tiny details that are still so thrilling.  The white "red"-bud tree is finally in full bloom!  Time for the update on the status of that little branch!

AMZi x x x x x

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